It's Good to be a Michigan Wolverine

Here's an article from that alleged newspaper The Detroit Free Press which was apparently written by the Emperor. In it, the Dark Lord of the Sith's writing oozes disdain for the Michigan fans who complained that the Detroit zookeeper named the zoo's wolverines, in what passes for humor among the greenly envious graduates of East Lansing high, Sparty and Bucky. Even more amusing than the article's attempt at a sarcastic skewering are the several dozen people in the Free Press forum who took the opportunity to bash the "couple dozen" Michigan fans who complainted to the zoo. It seems that this alleged petty issue was serious enough to stir up several times the number of complaints from Moo Uers than the number of Wolverines who did the original complaining.

The Sparties say that the complaints prove once again how whiny the ultra-liberal (I resent that) Michigan grads are. But how would they like it if we placed a name dripping with Maize and Blue pride on something as intimately associated with their institution as the wolverine is with ours? Such as if we made the people who work at McDonald's call themselves "wolverines"...Hurts, doesn't it?